Monday, December 10, 2012

Back in North America

Hey y'all.  I'm back in N. America... on my way back to Atlanta.

Much has happened since Jesus..... september?  Damn I have goten bad about writing.  But writing in general, not specifically blogging, is part of a... not New Years resolution... cause I think they are shit, but part of a goal I am setting for myself.  I really do like writing, letters, blogs, emails.  In a way, writing has always been my preferred form of communication.  I can be clearer with my thoughts.

Sooo... I just got back from Asia.  I had two weeks holiday to use and some things to do in Hong Kong.  So I went to Hong Kong and Thailand and sat on the beach and thought about things.

See... my contract is up with the circus at the end of Jan.  Yeah.  So I am officially out of work at the end of Jan.  In some ways I am super excited about it and I'm glad in a way that I'll be forced to go do something else and have new experiences.  So I am loosely coming up with some kind of plan now... but yeah keeping it loose.

So I went back to Hong Kong.  And I will write more about this next time perhaps.

But basically I was shocked and surprised as to how I felt about returning.  Basically I returned to this city which I loved... loved so much I really worked towards making it feasible for me to return to live...  So I went to HK this city I adored filled with people I loved.  And I found this... empty place?  Where I thought all the love was?  I don't know I really really used to love this place.  And now to feel nothing.  It's like waking up next to someone you have been with for a while who you love and going... what the hell...

Yeah... but then I left and sat on the beach for a week and now I feel better about it.  My relationships with that city have changed I guess... it doesn't feel like a potential home.

Don't get me wrong.  Hong Kong is one of my favorite cities in the world.  And actually as I was sitting on a friend's terrace my last night there drinking a beer and sharing some laughs before getting some thai street food... I thought yeah, this could be a home of sorts.  But at this present moment... I would have to work too hard to be happy I think.  And not that I am not into working hard.... but I have been working pretty hard to be happy for a while.  And I am ready for things to be a bit easier.

More on this later.  I am in the Toronto airport at the moment and beyond exhausted with a 3 hour flight and about 50 hour work week in front of me.  Yikes.